Tag Archives: Bible

2 days: Kandy did you know?

The greatest aspect of being a teacher is the opportunity to be a student for life, fostering the love of learning for every child in my classroom. I consider myself to not be an expert in any area because there is always, ALWAYS more to discover. Our journey to joy, our theme word for the year, has been no exception. At times, it felt like Jesus’ spittle had been rubbed on my eyes, giving them clear vision to uncover joy in some of the most amazing, and often unexpected, places.

My quiet time with God, the way I strive to start each day, held a deep well spring of joy hidden in verses I had previously overlooked. Or maybe it was God’s way of gently leading me to see what was right in front of my nose all along. Sometimes, I just want to pinch myself, the truth revealed being that exhilarating.

No secret that I celebrate the little stuff, these discoveries sometimes leave me wanting to dance, other times cry, and many times just plain speechless. Since I started this twenty-five day countdown, I vowed to be present this holiday season, my mantra was to not sweat the little stuff because I am recovering worrier, often taking on way more than I should and missing out of the little moments of life. In that vow, several times there were two days of blogs posted on the same day, but this is the first advent in a long time where I was not frazzled.

It is amazing how much more energy my spirit has had to learn when I am not running around like a crazy woman. Sometimes my sweetie looks at a gizmo or gadget and says, “Now, why didn’t I come up with this?” The take your breath away moments I have had this Christmas were equally awe-inspiring and baffling because I couldn’t believe I had never thought of them before.

All were dichotomous in the way that there was always more than meets the eye.

The baby who was born to die . . . so we could live

Our youth pastor breathed these words in a closing prayer the Sunday of our pageant. I stood by my pew with tears streaming down. Tender is the heart of a mother who has lost a child. Easter is my favorite holiday; so, I know the ultimate ending (on earth) for the sweet baby in the manger. God, in flesh, pure royalty chose to come to a world full of every possible evil to be born of humble heritage, knowing, KNOWING, he was coming to die. Although I am certain, she knew the prophesies, did Mary really know the implications of being the mother of God and what his calling on earth would be. My heart broke for hers all these years later because I remember holding that sweet little boy for the first time, laughing because his given name was present in his tiny red curls. Reed means red-haired. I could have never imagined that like Mary, I would outlive my child. Yet, because of her son someday I will see my son again. And for that, I can never be more thankful.

The first visitors were shepherds

Well, most everyone knows that. Next to tent makers and fisherman and farmers, shepherds are a pretty popular profession in the Bible. They are present in many different books of God’s word. But what most people (including me) don’t understand is that while there were plenty of them, theirs was not the most revered occupation. Later in life, Jesus even used them in some of his very own parables. What I didn’t understand was the solitary (in the field) lifestyle of the shepherd often prevented them from participating in ritual cleansings required by their faith. To many, they were lowly and unclean. No wonder, Goliath laughed at David, not only was he small in stature, but he would not have been respected by his own people either. Yet, when the King of Kings was born the first people to be told of the great news were the shepherds. Not having entertained the thought previously, I was humbled to think this is exactly what my Jesus is all about. The outcast, the reject, the lowly, the forgotten, the unclean, the huddled masses were exactly his favorites. He didn’t see shame or neglect or regret, only radiating love. From his first breath, the people the world chose to despise, were loved, loved enough to receive the first formal birth announcement.

Anniversary of his birth

Every year, Christmas is touted as the most wonderful time of the year. For many it is, but for millions of others it isolating, lonely, persecuting, or dreadful. I love Christmas (albeit not as much as I love Easter). Yet as a child, I along with every kid I knew well anxiously awaited its arrival. Wishing and dreaming of a morning filled with surprises was the highlight of the year. As parents, we have continued some of the same traditions for our children. Candles in the window, an Irish tradition, alert Mary and Joseph that there would be room in our home. Next to the tree, sits an empty manger waiting to be filled with a stand-in baby. My devotional the other day filled me with more awe than any other in a long time. In Mary and Joseph’s time, many knew the Messiah would one day come. His birth had been foretold in many different ways and through various prophets. The Israelites knew God to be a God of his promises. The exact time was not known, and yet, they waited in anxious expectation for his arrival. They waited for God’s promise to be revealed, much like children wait for Christmas packages. While today, we celebrate the anniversary of his birth, there is one component I had been missing all along. Like God’s people two thousand years ago, we are awaiting his return. He promised he would come. It has been so much easier to keep my vow to not worry over details when I used the perspective that what I am truly celebrating each year is exactly what Simeon waited for his whole life. He waited for the Messiah to come and each year on the anniversary of his birth, I am anxiously awaiting his return.

Learning is a lifelong journey. And God  truly knows this girl has a lot more to discover. May this Christmas be the one God reveals great lessons to your soul.

christmas angel

Saying Goodbye

I first met W – who for the rest of our time together I’ve lovingly called him Grandpa – at a craft show at the hockey arena.

Grandpa Adams

He and his wife were here visiting, and I was introduced to him by his daughter-in-law, K. She enthusiastically told him, “This is my very best friend”. I was amazed by his woodworking talents. Little did I know how that sweet little old man would come to hold a place in my heart!

After Grandpa moved to Marshall, he took in an interest in his church family and in K & S’s friends. That was extra special for us, because that meant that my children had a grandfather figure when their grandpas lived so far away. Didn’t matter if it was concerts, Boy Scout derbies, sporting events, or 4-H poultry shows even if it was 100 degrees; if he wasn’t busy, he attended.

I am so glad that I got to know him before his memories started to be cloudy and slowly a silent stealer took them away. My place in Grandpa’s life changed at the beginning of this journey. If I told the truth, it was really Grandpa’s place in my life that evolved. See my own grandfather, Papa, went on this same journey of lost memories and passed away just before all these changes happened for Grandpa. They were just a few years apart in age. This was something that wasn’t missed on this girl who no longer had her grandfathers.

Grandpa had a young man that lived with him and one day they had a disagreement. The young man called S (who couldn’t leave work) and K, who also couldn’t leave work, but who in turn called me. Oh my! My instructions were to see if I could calm everyone down. I didn’t know what I was going to do. Then I remembered; I had cookie salad in my fridge. My Tupperware in hand, off I went to diffuse a situation.

Never knowing the real reason for my stopping by and bearing sweets, Grandpa and I became pretty good friends. We visited at church and at “family” functions. As the journey wore on, so did the amount of care that Grandpa needed. One day, S and K asked if I would consider coming a few mornings a week to help provide caregiving.

Enthusiastically, I said yes! It was during this time, that I learned so many things about Grandpa’s life, and I didn’t mind if I heard the story over and over again. Every time, he told the stories his eyes twinkled, and I felt I got to see his heart. A heart that loved God above all, and through that love lavished love on his wife and his children and grandchildren!

After Grandpa moved to the M Manor, I wasn’t done taking care of him. I finagled my way into a volunteer position with our family dog, Huck, visiting residents. This way, I could regularly go see Grandpa and share just a few small moments with him.
There are so many personal memories that I could share, but I will limit it two of my favorites.

Grandpa and I share November birthdays – just three days apart. One year we had our birthday celebration at a local pizza place. We were a little late to arrive as usual. It is dark early in November; so, we could clearly see inside the windows. Grandpa was not “glowing” like a birthday boy should be. When we walked in, Grandpa’s whole demeanor changed. My husband whispered in my ear, “Remember this moment. Right now you are the Belle of the Ball. Look at how his face changed.” I don’t know if you have ever had that experience.  I have only had that moment once before – on my wedding day.

My second favorite memory is from my days of caregiving before Grandpa moved to the Manor. After a few weeks, he asked me if I would have devotions with him. Would I? Absolutely! The next time I arrived, he had his Bible, his devotional, and his prayer book for our church’s active missionaries. Those were some of the most precious times I have ever spent. We took turns reading, praying, and discussing the devotion.

One day, we read a devotional based on Psalm 105: 1-2, which I now think of as Grandpa’s verse.

Oh give thanks to the LORD, call upon His name;
Make known His deeds among the peoples.
2 Sing to Him, sing praises to Him;
[a]Speak of all His [b]wonders. (NASB)

During our discussion, I shared with him that I had a decision to make because I had been recently asked to begin speaking about our family’s story, including our great sadness. As I sat there at the kitchen table with tears streaming down my face, I said that this verse seemed to be confirmation as to what I was supposed to do – even though I was going to have to go way out of my comfort zone at times, leaving my family.

Without missing a beat, after a sip of his tea, he quietly said, “Jesus and I were wondering how long it was going to take you to figure that out.”

For all those who have heard me speak, those marching orders I have never forgotten.

I am so thankful to the family of W for giving me the chance to call him Grandpa. He will be missed until we can have devotions at his table again someday.

Seeing clearly after the fog

fog

Although he brings sorrow, he also has mercy and great love. Lamentations 3:32

This morning I started my day as usual with devotions.  Technology was not my friend as my Bible app would not open.  Not to be deterred, I grabbed my Devotional Bible – edited by Max Lucado – from my nightstand.  As I was heading to Ezekiel, my trusty book fell open to Lamentations.  Not just anywhere in Lamentations – nope – at a page that I had dog-eared and worn.  The highlighted words were a mirror reflection of where I was at last week – in a fog.

Thankfully, I had friends and family members praying for me and guiding me through what was quite possibly the hardest day of my life since the bus crash.  I did make it through, and miraculously with God’s help the fog lifted almost immediately.

I don’t believe in coincidences.  I needed that reminder this morning that God was not absent last week, nor was He when my son died.

I’m a prayer vigil person.  If I cannot sleep, it is usually because God has someone in mind that I should be praying for.  Last night was no different.  I have several friends, their kids, and communities facing a fog of their own.  So, I prayed . . .

While I personally cannot do much other than that to help ease the storm for each of them right now, I can remind them that there is one who can lift the fog.  My life story is a testament to that fact. Cling to him and He will guide you to new found peace.

The devotional below is from “No Wonder They Call Him the Savior” by Max Lucado.

The fog of the broken heart.

It’s a dark fog that slyly imprisons the soul and refuses easy escape.  It’s a silent mist that eclipses the sun and beckons the darkness.  It’s a heavy cloud that honors no hour and respects no person. Depression, discouragement, disappointment, doubt . . . all are companions of this dreaded presence.

The fog the broken heart disorients our life.  It makes it hard to see the road.  Dim your lights.  Wipe off the windshield.  Slow down.  Do what you wish, nothing helps.  When this fog encircles us, our vision is blocked and tomorrow is a forever away.  When this billowy blackness envelops, the most earnest words of help and hope are but vacant phrases.

If you have ever been betrayed by a friend, you know what I mean. If you have ever been dumped by a spouse or abandoned by a parent, you have seen this fog.  If you have ever placed a spade of dirt on a loved one’s casket or kept vigil at a dear one’s beside, you, too, recognize this cloud.

If you have been in this fog, or are in it now, you can be sure of one thing – you are not alone.  Even the saltiest of sea captains have their bearings because of the appearance of this unwanted cloud.  . .

Think back over the last two or three months.  How many broken hearts did you encounter? How many wounded spirits did you witness? How many stories of tragedy did you read about? . . .

The list goes on and on, doesn’t it?  Foggy tragedies. How they blind our vision and destroy our dreams.  Forget any great hopes of reaching the world.  Forget any plans of changing society. Forget any aspirations of moving mountains. Forget all that. Just help me make it through the night!

The suffering of the broken heart . . .

Seeing God . . .does wonders for our own suffering.  God was never more human than at this hour.  God was never nearer to us than when he hurt.  The Incarnation was never so fulfilled as in the garden. 

As a result, time spent in the fog of pain could be the God’s greatest gift.  It could be the hour that we finally see our Maker . . . Maybe in our suffering we can see God like never before.

The next time you are called to suffer, pay attention.  It may the closest you ever get to God.  Watch closely.  It could very well be that the hand that extends itself to lead you out of the fog is a pierced one. 

I know the story behind this song, but sometimes I believe that it was written just for me.  I think music is often a reflection of my soul and story.

18 Days to Go: My help comes from the Lord

My help comes from the LORD, who made heaven and earth! (NLT) Psalm 121:2

It would come as no surprise to anyone who has ever put on a big event that Reed’s Run is a ton of work.  Most of the time, I flit about with the adrenaline of an alligator rustler accomplishing one task or another.  This year; however, I have been having bouts of anxiety and feelings of being overwhelmed.  I really think that my main issue is that I have poured five years of my life into these four Reed’s Runs and now this is it.

Even though I seem to be accomplishing tasks a little slower than usual, my passion for keeping things rolling hasn’t waned.  This past week, however, God has lead me to verses that have really helped me to remember that all of his promises are true, and that He truly cares for us.  Just tonight as we were preparing for AWANA tomorrow, I was reminded of one of the verses that all my kids have learned.

1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your worries and cares to God, because He cares for you.  (NLT) 

Each and every day this week, God has reminded me that everything (including Reed’s Run) has a season, and that He has everything under control.  All the to-do lists, the order forms, the financial concerns, the weather, the meetings – EVERYTHING is under His control.  The success of Reed’s Run has less to do with us and more to do with God’s blessings on the event.  Even though Daniel & I and our kids are the keepers of Reed’s legacy, the story ultimately belongs to God – who knew and loved Reed before we even met him.

Today I needed to run an errand at a neighborhood church.  I know the Pastor, and we had a short visit about life and about the nature of the errand.  Being the sweet gentleman that he is, he inquired how Reed’s Run planning was going.  I don’t know what possessed me.  Maybe it is the fact that I was standing in a church talking to a man of God.  I stood there and was completely honest.  I shared with Him about my feelings of anxiety.  With tears, he walked over to his desk and shared what he had just been reading.  He simply picked up his Bible to where it was already open, and shared a verse in the Psalms on anxiety.

Yes, I cried as he moved from the Psalms to Habakkuk 3:17 –  18

17 Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,

though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
18 yet I will rejoice in the Lord,
I will be joyful in God my Savior. (NIV)

I cried even more. But in his gentle way this man reminded me that I had always praised the Lord in the storm so why should these planning days be any different. Even more revealing to my heart, than the sweet intervention on my emotions, was the fact that God had the whole meeting planned in the first place.

In honor of today’s blog, I am posting the official video of the song we have chosen for this year’s Reed’s Run official song. I guess I just needed a reminder of where my hope originates. Thank you, Lord, for giving me eyes to see your presence in all the ways you have helped me this week. My help and hope really did come from the Lord.  But thank you for reminding me in lots of ways that the detail that matters the most is Your Love for all of us!