Tag Archives: teenagers

Teenagers & last minute DIY’s

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Lately, I have noticed a Facebook post being shared over and over.  The basic gist of the post cautions about teenagers coming to your home Trick-or-Treating.

Before I go any farther, let’s get one thing straight.  If Halloween isn’t your thing, that is okay.  We all have our things and I won’t judge you for yours, and please don’t judge me for mine. And if you must know, I don’t do ketchup on hot dogs. Miracle Whip is like my Kryptonite. And when I ask for extra, extra ice in my drink in the drive-thru, I am expecting the straw to hit a cube on the way in. Like, I said, we’ve all got our thing.

Okay, back to the point. On Halloween, some teens are greeted with a “Aren’t you a little old to be doing this?” The author of that post, whomever you are, I applaud you, because I agree what else would you rather they be doing?  I love when teens dress up and stop by for three reasons:

  • They still have a sense of imagination and wonder. If they aren’t “too cool” to Trick-or-Treat, then they are just about perfect in my book, especially if they are bringing younger children out and about.
  • Like the author purports, there are about a million other things that they could be doing in the dark and they aren’t. We should celebrate this. They are choosing to dress up and still participate in childhood (which I seriously think is becoming an endangered species in this country).  And for this choice – Good. For. Them.
  • And maybe I am a bit selfish on this last reason, but it is always some quiet teenager that pulls me aside and whispers, “I really like what you did with the shoes”.

That last one melts my heart every time.  I am much older than the costumed guest, but a secret little corner of my heart screams, “You get me!  You are my kind of people.  Thank you for noticing.”  Only the last line of that ever gets uttered aloud.

The shoes.  Oh, the shoes! They are so much fun and a very quick and easy DIY.

shoes

Here is what you need to wow the teenagers in your neighborhood and transport your heart back to Kansas teenage-dom.

Supplies needed:

1 pair of ladies pumps (I purchased these for $3 at the thrift store.  They were originally tan and I didn’t think to take a before picture. Haven’t quite released my inner Martha Stewart yet.)

1 bottle of Modge Podge

1 paint brush

1 jar of red glitter (I am warning you I have a love-hate relationship with glitter.  I love all things bling, but that stuff is the bane of my existence.  I once did a glitter project with my 2nd graders and I swear that Pompeii’s eruption was less painful.  Every day for a month after that, I looked like I had a nose piercing.  Bane. Of. My. Existence, unless of course, you need a little shimmer. Not nose ring shimmer, but you get the point.)

1 pair of striped socks (Tights would work well here too. I used long socks.)

Some newspaper.

Creation Station:  (Okay, I took a little liberty there.  I used the center island in my kitchen but dubbed it a fancy name for the moment. Hey some days it is a science center because the people around here do not know how to rinse oatmeal out of a bowl.  Yeah. Oatmeal sticks to your ribs and I have proof because it becomes like cement in your unrinsed bowl.)

The steps to this DIY are considerably simpler than removing that oatmeal.

Use the paint brush to brush on liberal amounts of Modge Podge in small sections of the shoes.  I placed the shoes in a rimmed cookie sheet to contain some of that glitter eruption.  Sprinkle glitter over the areas coated with Modge Podge and continue until all the areas are covered.  The shoes I mean.  Yes, I know this will also mean the counter and you, but try, for the love of all zucchini, try to keep it contained.

shoes-2

Allow the blinged shoes dry.  While they are drying, stuff newspaper into the striped socks.  Oh who am I kidding?  Take this time to check your e-mails or social media and enjoy a nice beverage.  Mine was sweet tea until I discovered . . . oh yes, you got it, GLITTER.

Now the last step is fairly easy but does require a little finesse.  Stuff your newspaper filled socks into your shoes and situate the socks and shoes so that your garage door (when shut) appears to have fallen on the Wicked Witch.

DIY – done.  Simply.

Now if teenagers show up to your house, be kind and remember they are still kids.  And just give them the candy, unless of course, you are stocking up for a Netflix binge.  No judgment here – we’ve all got our thing.

 

 

 

 

 

Gotcha Day

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This July, we celebrated two relatively unknown holidays. For the rest of the world, our celebration did not create even the tiniest blip on the radar. Yet for two young ladies, Gotcha Day is a huge part of their lives. The background story on this is one that meshes well with our family’s concept of “created family” – friends become “aunts and uncles” and mix in a few “adopted” grandparents and college age sons. God planted amazing people in our midst, including one cousin to my husband. Growing up, they were not that close as he was older than my sweetie, but “Uncle Bryan” as my girls call him has a younger sister who was Daniel’s closest confidante for most of his growing up years.

Uncle Bryan and his wife, Michelle, really impressed us as a young couple. They were and are amazing parents, and ones whom in our earlier years, we hoped to emulate. Our decision wasn’t difficult when we asked them to be Reed’s godparents. They were tops on our list. Along with another set of dear, dear friends, Lorrie and Jay, Bryan and Michelle were Reed’s godparents. All four grieved along with us as we said good-bye to the redheaded sunshine of our world when he passed away at age 12.

All of our other children have incredible godparents, including the younger sister mentioned earlier. A few years ago, Sally was really missing Reed and figured Uncle Bryan was too. At our family reunion, she wandered out to the fish cleaning shack and put forth a proposal. Would you be my godfather too? I am fairly sure that he had no idea that was coming, but he readily agreed to step in and love her the way he had and continues to love Reed. In that one precious moment, Gotcha Day was created.

Fast forward two years and once again; we are at our family reunion, sometimes referred to as Nowatzki-palooza, because of the sheer numbers of us present. During the previous two years, Sal had opportunities to do things with both of her godfathers; conveniently both named “Uncle Bryan” to her. At the reunion, she could not wait to cuddle up with Uncle Bryan and see what was happening in his world. Our family reunions are all-day and well-into-the-night affairs. After Sally gave her good night hugs to those around the campfire, our Sister saddled up next to Uncle Bryan. The two have shared a good repartee of banter from the moment she first got a cell phone. For her grateful daddy, most of his advice centering on boys, making good choices, and encouraging her in sports.

Sometime in the middle of the night, Sister shared with him how much her little sister loves him and how she wished she had that. Sadly, her godparents divorced in her toddlerhood. Watching her brothers interact with their godfathers, she was always wistful for the same.  In the middle of the night his heart melted, the man who took on one . . . took on another.

By morning, I learned that Erin had a new godfather with a very familiar sounding name. Uncle Bryan stole her heart, which is hard to do for a teenage girl in a technologically, clambering world. Tears in my eyes, I added another Gotcha Day to the calendar.

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Although our Gotcha Days are one day apart, the love shared binds together three hearts, and the driving force behind their creation flows deeply from the heart of one incredible godfather. As a mom, I could not imagine a more wonderful solution. More importantly, I believe a redheaded young man looks down from heaven and smiles that old familiar grin at this arrangement, more than happy to share his godfather.

bryan and erin

I saw God at the prom

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The jokes of blue tuxes, boot casts for shoes, and forgetting the corsage were staples around our house leading up to the first prom for our son.  A little good natured ribbing is a part of the fabric that makes up our family; so the jokes were just the norm.  As the mother of the young man in the couple, my traditional role was to help pay for the tux (which after seeing the final bill made me think that creating one out of duct tape might not have been a bad idea after all).  As shared in a previous blog, my gift of love for the young couple was to make them a coursed meal from scratch.  http://kandynolesstevens.com/2013/04/30/one-tired-momma-and-lots-of-fun/ While definitely a labor of love, it was worth every scrumptious bite.

This was the first prom for both Sawyer and Rachel, but given their big hearts, it definitely was one to remember.  It all began much earlier as our sweet kids decided that they wanted to invite a friend of Reed’s to the prom.  (This would have been Reed’s senior prom, and thus, it would have been for B as well.  I think the video the kids made tells that story better than I ever could.

What they don’t tell you in the video is that Sawyer was just released from the hospital having his 7th surgery since the bus crash; hence, the jokes about the boot cast.  From that moment on, those two kids made sure that every decision they made was to honor Brayden.  In their minds, it was his last prom, and they still a chance to attend more.  They kept his family in the loop for tuxes and colors, bought two boutonnieres, and found the perfect vehicle to attend the drive-up (which was totally foreign to this momma).  A lot about prom in Minnesota was different than the proms I attended in Florida. While other kids arrived in muscle cars, decked out trucks, or vintage roadsters, the awesome trio arrived in a fully equipped motorhome so that Brayden would be able to arrive in comfort.

They put a lot of thought into their entrance, recruiting a couple little girls (one sister and one friend) to carry a banner that said “Live a Life of Love” as the RV pulled up to the red carpet.  They entered as a trio after Brayden and his wheelchair were sashayed down the ramp from the camper.  The three marched through Grand March, and, at least from the three families involved, there wasn’t a dry eye among us when Brayden had the biggest smile on his face at the photo stops.  He knew that he was the Prince of the Ball, and no one could deny it. It is a good thing that B loves lights because his paparazzi rivaled that of a celebrity on that night!

prom night 2

At one point, Reed’s best girl friend came running over and wanted to make sure that the four of them were in a picture together.  It was hard to keep the tears in, because in my heart I knew that if Reed were here, it would have been all five of them in the picture as I am certain that young lady would have been his date.

prom night 1

Although not the typical start of the prom, we all waited to watch Brayden’s first dance because he wouldn’t be staying much longer.  After cooling off for a while outside, B and his entourage (parents, grandparents, siblings, friends, workers) went inside to find Sawyer waiting for his arrival with a quick thumbs up.  He wheeled Brayden out to the floor, only to discover that Rachel had stepped away to visit her friends.

What could have been an odd moment was completely changed as Reed and Brayden’s classmates: girls first, followed by the boys, surrounded both young men on the dance floor. That magical moment  is one I will never forget as the whole group all danced together with the Beau of the Ball.

Huge tears streaked down my cheeks as I witnessed quite possibly the most, tender moment – EVER.  Originally, I had been a little uncomfortable peeking in at that time-honored moment of teenage revelry because I felt they deserved their privacy, but I am so glad I pushed past my comfort zone of Southern tradition.

Because if I hadn’t stayed, I would have missed seeing God’s love at the prom. A love that shone brightly through the gift of one amazing friend who blessed us all!

Behold it was . . . Rachel

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Sixteen years ago, when we bought our house, we thought that this would be a great starter home, and in a few years we would buy the one of our dreams.  After settling in and getting to know our neighbors, our roots grew deeper and deeper.  One day I was sharing those sentiments with my Mama, and what she said seemed to settle the matter.  “Well, honey, you were going to move until your neighbors convinced you otherwise.”

So it goes with much of what happens in my life.  I often have plans or standards until God shows me that my plans need to change, or at least, my thinking needs to bend.  So it has recently gone with our family’s thoughts on dating.

Our rule has always been: No Dating. No Dating. No Dating in high school. Our thoughts were you are only kids once. Then along came a sweet girl in study hall. Blast that study hall – where no one actually does any studying!  In all honesty, our families have known each other for years, but the girl suddenly went from just a girl we knew to the interest of our son’s heart.

As this budding romance began, I had some conversations with the young lady’s mom which in turn led to our family praying about this situation.  She knew our family’s stand on dating, and she also knew us to be people of our words.

Many know that the verse of my title actually ends in “Behold it was Leah.”  Genesis 29:25 (NIV) Jacob’s surprise ending to what he thought was going to be the love of his life, but ended in a major disappointment.   Our willingness to pray about the situation led from our awareness that perhaps our thoughts needed some adjusting.  One realization was our sadness that our young man wasn’t so little and wouldn’t be living with us for that many more years, and the other was that he would have plenty of his own Leah moments in life as that growing up took place.  Having rigidity in our parenting isn’t something we were known for; so, we didn’t want to begin now, causing all of us disappointment.

After looking at how he has conducted himself in every other aspect of life and after spending much time in prayer, we knew that our thinking was based not on the responsible young man who lives with us. We decided that as long as one condition was met, the two could begin dating (which mostly consists of hanging out at either house with parents home).  We have always expected our sons to be gentlemen and this was no exception.  The condition: we required Sawyer to ask her parents’ permission to date her and to share about his faith and how he would conduct himself with their daughter.  Showing courage beyond his years, he did.

But that is only part of the story . . .

The sweet girl shares his love for Jesus and for others. Both share a love for little kids – she’s a Sunday school teacher while he coaches little kid football. Family dinners, movie nights, impromptu suppers after sporting events became routine. (I will admit that it probably took some time to get used to our senses of humor.) Over time, she just blended right into the fold of this crazy life we lead around here.

So even though, I am still having a hard time letting go of childhood for a soon-to-be man, I could not be more thankful that the girl we all get to grow up with is Rachel.

God only knows what the future holds for them each as individuals, much less as a couple, but I do know that when he was little we prayed for “the girl” he would find someday.  I just didn’t think we’d get to meet her so soon.

sawyer and rachel